I think I'm not going to ask Kel about the movie. I think I'm not going to watch it. Cos I don't want to be disappointed again, in case it is called off or postponed.

Someone asked me:
Why can't our lives be like those of the characters in TV series?
Well, I think that it's the reason why people created the shows in the first place. We can't live like that so we can only watch it happen in the TV series.

GOD! Can you believe it? I cried. WW called to ask if I wanted to go send Nyein back. I do.
While talking, I got so frustrated that I cried.

Haiz....this is really getting real old! Guy hurt gal, gal cry.
But well, luckily I didn't cry. I'm so so so hurt! By 2 person, can you believe it?!

Haiz....miss everyone....already.
Called MQ out to pass her her birthday present. She bought hair dye. Too bad I can't dye mine. Parents won't allow.
I very sad cos WW once again pushed back the KTV thing.
Then on MSN...also very sad cos of something...not really angry...is hurt?! Yeah! And, yeah, I know I AM petty but, don't everyone have flaws?

Yesterday just had our prom night.
Went down to grand's. Went to saloon to make my hair. My youngest aunt helped me to make-up. My mama(godmother) bought a pair of 'earrings' and some hair clips for me. My youngest aunt loan me her camera and eye lotion. My mama also loan me her necklace and bracelet. Den my mama and papa(godfather) sent me to Oriental Hotel.
When I reached there, took picture with Yee Sin then went into the lobby of the hotel. They(WW, MQ, Ling, ...) say I pretty. Haha...very funny!
SMS-ed someone. (S)he said I chio. Haha...don't worry I know you only kidding.
Dinner wasn't very nice. Didn't eat the noodles. And only ate two spoons of honeydew sago. Was very sweet. The chicken was quite nice.
Had games. Funny. Had lucky draw. Won 11th prize out of the 50 prizes. Happy. Was a calculator. Had prom king and queen nomination and selection. Sharon and JunRong didn't win but in my heart, they are prom k and q. They even sat together!
SL and Huiqi sat together! Took their picture. Will be posting here soon...(JR and Sharon's also)
Went alot of times to the restroom. Once, my eyes red so went. Then put eye lotion. Then one of the contacts went out of place. Spent quite a long time putting back.(when preparing, even worse. Used 40 minutes) Then once, when I went out, I pushed the door open and sort of hit HW. Sorry. Didn't know you were there.
Sang songs.
Danced. Macarina and Chihuahua. Then disco.
Took alot of pictures.
Papa, mama and sis came to bring me home.

12.35am
Just 18 hours, 25 minutes and 15 seconds later, I'll be at Oriental Ballroom aith the seniors of Xinmin Sec Sch'03. Looking forward to it.
I tried to sleep but could not. I'm going to miss you people, very much(esp.Ling who's going back to M'sia) and all the teachers too.
Haiz...I think I really cried alot these days. Got to stop already. I think I go watch Wishing Stairs with Kel. Asked her but only haven't confirm where and when. Got to remember to ask her.
WW bought a tube dress. She and SH say one. It's black. I haven't seen it yet so looking forward to seeing WW in it :P NOTE: I not lesbian okay?! I'm perfectly straight!
Haiz...I think I go try sleep now if not tomorrow wake up with an even bigger eye bag and darker 'panda eyes'.
Miss ya all! See ya!
12.43am
*Never give up before you even try it

I have had enough! Can't they either just leave me alone or at least just SHUT UP!? I am now very frustrated! And, believe it or not, I just cried again. I can't stand it anymore. I just want a moment of peace. Is it too much to ask.
And my bro just said that I am too CHILDISH to be able to make any decision. Can you believe it?! I really feel like getting out of here!

The Fruits Basket Stories Section still under "construction" !!!
(actually is I lazy to type in the stories :P)

Yesterday watched The Haunting with my sis...very scary...
Then watched MVP. Now on disc 10. But had to stop to watch Westside Story episode 6. Very nice :P.
One more day to prom. Looking forward to it. I don't have a camera so got to ask those bringing to help me take. Hope they agree.
Haiz...very tired now. Yesterday quite late then sleep. Cos write reply letter to that person who sent the letter to me. I'm not going to care about the matter mentioned by that person. I ain't going to help nor am I going to interfere.
How I wish Fruits Basket book 7 is out. WW and I looking forward to reading it. Cos very nice book. :)
Then I want to read GON book 8 but don't know if have anot. Then Ling like don't have, never buy or haven't buy. So...have to wait or maybe won't even get to read but nevermind.
I MUST MUST MUST buy the Westside Story CD! I really love the songs. :P But got to see if I've got enough money anot first. Hope I have!

Aiyah! HW guessed correctly le...I not going out today again. But not cos they went on their own and didn't ask me...but is my mum say cannot. HAIZ....

I received a letter today. From someone I least expected. (S)he apologised for something and asked for a favor of not bad-mouthing her/him. Don't worry! I won't!
Today celebrate Mr Rodrigues' and Sharon's birthday. Ate the fruit cake. Very nice but very sour. Then took alot of pictures.
They started a cake fight. But luckily we were safe. Haha...
Went home with Stella. Talked to her about JC stuff. YES! She also most likely going NYJC.
She got 2 younger sister. One Sec 1 next year.
Later going out but still don't know what time.

11.07am
I cried, yet again. My bro said he will go eat with my family cos he heard that I wasn't going(from my sis). I had thought I was hearing things. But I wasn't! When my mum said that they were waiting for me to change clothes, he appeared shocked that I was going. He said:"Huh?! She's going arh?!" He didn't know how hurt I felt. I really HATE guys!!! And I really mean HATE! I've been hurt lots of times by them. I HATE them!
11.12am

6.32pm
Tony so...handsome :P Saw him on the Westside Story nao shi chen wo shou hui on TV. Very nice! Xin(1) gan(1)...as called by Zhong Qin. :P
I cried...once again. Can I just get out of here? I just want to watch the follow up on this wo shou hui yet they keep making noise. I'm so frustrated! Told sis to keep quiet, just for awhile, and she made even more noise. I've had enough!!!
6.36pm

I just found out today that "leopards can never change their spots". PC is a very good example of this!

25-10-03 2.10am Saturday
As I promised, I wrote on a paper and...
Thurs morning went school...gave Yue Lian, Huiqi and Mrs Wong the paper to write autograph for me (aiyah...gave alot of people. Can't possibly name all.4E1 students and teachers and close friends from Sec 4E)
First lesson, Chinese, gave one to Mrs Fong. Had a free period.Second lessom, Chemistry, gave one to Mrs Teo. Had lesson for around 45 minutes. Then they(some of the guys, Teck Wee, Kelvin etc) played some sad music(cos 4E2 also played and sang). Then we also sang 13 birthday songs for 12 persons - Siew Wei, Nyein Nyein, Yan Shan, Nurul, Milene, Meiqin, Jia Xing, Sharon, Guo 'An, SDhengle, Wee Siang and of course WangWang. When we sang for SL, we started chanting YanShan's name then 'kiss'...LOLX
Mrs Teo went to Ker Wei(who chanted very loudly) and said:"I kiss you arh." LOLX. All of us laugh.Then from GA to WS to WW, we sang slower and slooooower and sloooooooooooower still. Very funny. Could not stop laughing. Mrs Teo promised us a treat on the 18th of Nov. $20 each person. WAH!!! She's going to be broke. Our class got 44 students!
Miss Koh's lesson next. Gave her the paper asked her to help me write. Took alot of pictures. Told JX to let me see the photos after he washed them so that I can choose which one to wash. Then the guys(Kevin, Andreas etc.) danced 'Marcarina'.Very funny. Then they started the Chihuahua dance in class. WW and some gals joined in.
Once recess bell rang, I escaped and went to 4E5 to give paper to SSM. Took photo with Asmah. Passed the autograph book to Zhonglun (when Asmah/YanCheng returned to me).
Went to 4E4 to give the paper to HW and YunYun. Took picture with them and Julia. Wanted to go back class. Saw 4E1 and 4E2 students lined up outside class. Then they danced Chihuahua dance. WS, JX and GA took picture with Mrs Teo. Jul helped them to take. I went back to 4E4 to tell Yun2 and HW about the dance then I went to give the paper to Mr Ho then went back to class. Heard that Mrs Low(pricipal) was quite pleased but Mr Arthur Lim scolded them. Next was Mr Chee's physics period. Yes! Yippee! No lesson. Saw slideshows and videoclips while listening to sad music and songs. We listened to the playback of birthday songs we sang during Chemistry lesson and laughed.
Then we aligned in rows and swayed from side to side with arms around each other while singing to Graduation(friends forever). Then in a 'circle'(but guys and gals never join) and continued while You Cai and Teck Wee filmed. Continued to see slide. Heehee...Shi Jie and Yan Shan act cute in the photos. Hmm...so is Yan Shan with who? SJ or SL? I wonder...
Next, English. Copied answers then free period. Ms Mazna gave us 3 Fererro Roche EACH and 2 packets of Famous Amos cookies for the whole class to share.(Band one English only.:P I gave 1 to SH 1 to Freddy. Sorry, WS) Then after school, hugged. (Vivien Toh, Ai Ping, Nurul, Ling, SH, Julia, WW(but she later say never...?! Did I remember wrongly?) Then for some guys(e.g. Kok Hong, JX,WS, Freddy), I shook hands with them.
Packed bag and prepared to go to library(SH, WW and me). Instead we wrote in Ker Wei's autograph book then WW and I went back to class to return him the book. They were watching the slides AGAIN. Seems like Ker Wei was crying. Mq, Milene and Sl sat at 4E2's class. We went over. Asked SL if he cried. He said yes.
Went CompassPoint with WW (SH didn't want to go). WW teared when we talking. Ate chee chong fun then bought 10 packets of large fries, 4 large barley and 1 large sprite from Buger King for Teck Wee and the others. The drinks so heavy. Cost us $35! The sprite WW and I shared. Gave them the food and drinks. You Cai treated them. WW and I went out of class to finish drink. Hugged her cos I really very sad cos last day of school already(also, she say we didn't. cos she hug people got different feeling. ??!!)
(Had a few group hugs earlier...eg. with SH WW and Julia)
WW and I then went to find Ms Koh but she not in. Asked Ms Ong to help me write autograph. Scared she don't know who I am but she know and said she not so blur.
WW and I borrowed glue from Kok Hong to stick 5 pieces of the paper together to write a note for Ms Koh. When we went back to class to borrow the glue, we saw Ker Wei and the rest acting silly.
Ww and I wrote the note then went home.
On way home, we sang alot of sad songs.
Home sweet home. Didn't have mood to study. Very sad.
Friday, headache.
Watch Tamil show cos my dad recommend. Then I slept for 2-3 hours. When I woke up they were still watching!!! Watched Holland V. Couldn't study. Someone asked me something (basketball). So I went online. Phone WW to ask her come online. She bathe then half an hour later came online.
Talked to GA, WW and HW. Hw told me that when the people did the dance, 4E5 students booed at them.
Sad! Cos miss 4E1.
Just now, 1am plus, talked to WW(offline) on the phone until 2 am. Phone HW but he sleeping. (I thought he would be awake as he said he wanted to go study.
25-10-03 3am Saturday


06-11-03 12.35am Thursday
I was channel-surfing on the radio when I came across Vitamin C's Graduation(friends forever) on 88.3 FM at around 12.20am or so. Without meaning to, I cried. The tears just came falling as I listened to the lyrics of the song and also all the spoken parts. They just perfectly describe my feelings.
When I first came to Xinmin Secondary School, I wasn't exactly very happy or excited but, luckily, I had WangWang. I was insecure as WW appeared to fit in and make friends much more easily than me. But then I met ChairChair, ChayLing and GuoWei. Also, being in the same CCA(choir), class(1E2) and hoouse(scorpian), I became quite close to HongWei. And so, I began to feel like I fit in this school. I also became friends with SinHui-all thanks to WW- and also Julia. Soon, Sec1 ended and I became a Sec2 student. I was very depressed as I was separated for the first time from WW in 7 years. I had been in the same class as her since Pri1. But luckily, I had Jul and SH whom I became quite close with. Also, I came to know SianMeng, Asmah, Joanne and YanCheng too. Sec3 began. Same class as WW, Sh and Jo but not the rest. Bagan to go to school with Jo(near the end of year) as we took the same bus(most of the time). Even closer to WW and SH; and also quite close with Peiqi(because she sat beside me); Shengle and NyeinNyein(they sat behind me); LingLing, HW, Andreas and Chair2(because of same CCA-choir); and Jo(because of same CCA and because we took same bus). Sometimes go to 3E4and 3E5 to find HW, Jul, Asmah and YamCheng. A little closer to YiHeng and Shahid(YiHeng-same CCA; both- follow-up for orchid project) as we wentr NYJC for the project to make agar.
Actually, that wasn't a very good year for me as I hurt HW alot of times, and, we even stopped talking to each other for 2 to 3 months. Also, I tried my best to avoid him and his close friends-HuiTing, YunYun, Jul, YanCheng and Chair2. HW forgave me. (alot of things followed...but, hehe...I'll keep to myself.) Sec4. Desmond got retained. So, we have got 1 less classmate. Very sad actually. Went out with ASEAN scholars-except Andreas and Freddy-and Sh, WW and HW to celebrate Ling's birthday.(her treat. heehee....thanks!!!) Followed by sadness(secret...heehee...). Then pc hurt Tranquil. Hate him very much. Time to find teachers to sign CCA form. pc followed me around alot. HW-who had all along hated pc- thought I was close to pc so scolded me. Quarelled(26-07-03). But on the day of Geography preliminary examinations, he started talking to me, and we made up. (all along thanks to Ms Tee for listening to me) I was, and still am, determined not to let pc affect my friendships anymore. Made a best friend(NGBF).
23rd October 2003. Last day of school. Very sad and depressed. But did not and could not cry. Start of 'o' levels exam. Back to present. Now is 1.08am (06-11-03). Later having Elementary Mathematics Paper2 but cannot sleep as very sad and depressed.
Okay I think I better sleep already. Goodnight...opps...good morning everyone....zzz...
06-11-03 1.10am Thursday


06-11-03 6.25am Thursday
Well, yesterday while listening to the song, I thought back to all the times we spent together and quarelled and debated. To part with some of you made me real depressed that the tears came falling and before I knew it, I was crying uncontrollably. Ling will be returning to Malaysia so there is not much time left together with her(only until last day of chalet). I don't want to part with her or anyone but.... I guess there's nothing I can do.
Everything would end one day, be it sooner or later.
'Tian(1) xia(4) wu(2) bu(4) san(4) zhi(1) yan(4) xi(2)'
So, I've got to get used to the fact. But, at least there's still MSN Messenger. :P
Okay, I've got to change into my uniform to go to school now.
06-11-03 6.35am Thursday


06-11-03 5.25pm Thursday
Wrote GA's autograph book(AGAIN!!!)
(PRIVATE ENTRY)
06-11-03 5.37pm Thursday


06-11-03 8.10pm Thursday
(PRIVATE ENTRY)
06-11-03 8.20pm Thursday


10-11-03 12.08am Monday
Today, I'm going to have my Additional Mathematics Paper 1. I have been slacking these few days. And so, I ain't at all prepared for the next few papers. I'm just so tired of studying. I'm really feeling so tired. Also, I keep thinking about other problems which doesn't even involve me. The depression matter and the pc and tranquil matter. The two matters do not have anything to do with me but my close friends. So, I guess that is why I keep thinking about them.
After graduation, all of us will be going our separate ways, just like what is said in the song Graduation(friends forever) by Vitamin C. It's such a depressing thought. Of all the people I've asked, many wants to go to AJC or VJC, some wants to go to SRJC, and a few wants to go to the poly, but none wants to go to NYJC where I'm going. Why? Some said that the buildings are old. Some said that the standard has dropped. Firstly, the JC is undergoing construction so, soon, it will be very new-looking. Secondly, so what if the standard dropped? Perhaps it only dropped a little bit and not alot. It's up to the year's batch of students. They have to be hardworking in order to get good results. The standard of the JC does not determine one's result.
So, I guess it's a sure thing that I'm going there, unless, of course, my 'o' level results are so bad that I can't get in.
Ater 'o's, I'm going to enjoy myself. And maybe work too. I'm going to Sakae Sushi, K Box, chalet(4E1), maybe Sizzler, arcade(?! someone wants to 'pull' me there), Escape(my sister wants to go), movies(I want to watch 'Wishing Stairs' as it seems to be a nice movie), Science Centre(if Mrs teo really does bring us there to see the stars), dinner(Graduation night;with Mrs Teo), library(I have got a few books I want to borrow-MVP Lover, Fearless, Smallville, Shen a! Qing gei wo duo yi dian shi jian), WW's house(see her prom dress;play SIMS?!), East Coast Park(to enjoy sea breeze), Grandmother's house(very long time never go down), shopping(window shopping only), swimming(very long time never swim. I think I forgot how to already), play badminton(miss it), cycling(wanted to at the chalet at East Coast, but was too late to rent. Then the matter with SH and WW happened so...), Kel's house(watch VCDs while eating snacks), out with my youngest aunt(Lilian Yee), out with WW,SH, Kel, Ling(especially Ling as not much time left with her as she going back M'sia), and so on so on.
Okay. I think I have to go sleep already.
Good....zzz...
10-11-03 12.40am Monday


10-11-03 12.43pm Monday
Happy birthday, Nurul!
Just now after A Math P1, went to CP with SH.
Guess who I met?! Caleb Lim Shi Liang a.k.a. carrot or calebee. My ex-godbrother from Pri 5 and 6. He's in St. Gabriel's now.
I was walking past the Aiji ichiban(?!) shop when suddenly I saw someone who looked like Caleb but wasn't sure so I continued talking to SH. He waved to me but I didn't wave back as I was quite surprised. But I kept looking back at him and saw him lookging at me. Confirm that person IS Caleb! SH told me that she saw Caleb staring at us but she didn't know him so had thought he was staring at me.
Well, this is my SECOND time seeing HIM this year and BOTH times at CP. First time was with WW and SH. We went to the library. Saw him at the barber. I think that was the day before our 'o' level chinese oral and we went BK yo eat and practise.
Well, I think so coincidental because Caleb a.k.a. Spiderman (Raymond-Ryu; Kel-Storm; me-Cola-copied from someone's nick) lives in Seng Kang.
Before these 2 'meetings', the last time I saw him was when we went back to Xinghua. Then got another time was when we went to the movies as a group(with Lester, WW, Yong Hin, Kel,...) at Bishan. Sorry, WW. If you know what I mean. I think that was last year(both incidents).
*"Make new friends, keep the old. New friends are silver, old friends are gold." I'm going to ask Caleb for his email address asap so as to keep in touch. Quite a fun guy except for the time he stuck that rabbit sweet in my hair. Had alot of fun playing catching and blind cat. He was one of the few guys who have been to my house before. The others are Raymond, John and HW. I went to Caleb's house before. I think that was before Chinese New Year. His mother served me homemade CNY snacks. Very nice! :p
10-11-03 1.10am Monday


10-11-03 3.22pm Monday
Then after that went supermarket and then Popular with SH. She went home and I went to the library and comic shop. Went to basement, saw a little of Westside Story(Second episode I think-the one when Jason said 'Wu Neng' when he read fromthe banner-on which 'USELESS' is written by Xing Wang). Love it! You Ya Yu very superb. He can jump across buildings. WowWow.
Went to interchange. Saw GA, JX, WS, Kun Jian and Jun Jian. Don't know why but GA then WS then JX said that KunJian had something to tell me. The rest boarded 159 and then I interrogated GA. He said that someone say I and JX( Don't know what) and someone said that I and KunJian(also don't know what). Then he say I like alot of guys(?! Still don't know what). What the...
But I said that he and JX and KunJian 'gao(1) gay', which shut him up. Then I said I won't help him for the favor.
He boarded 371.
*NOTE: Just want to make things clear. JX and KunJian are my friends. JX and I became friends as I SMS him and he SMS me. KJ and I became friends on the night of band concert this year. I only know him, like, for months. And JX only not long ago also. And as for GA, I guess all of you should know...right? GUYS AND GALS CAN BE CLOSE FRIENDS!
*It is always better to be loved than to love. But it is always best to be loved AND to love.(Heard from radio)
*If letting someone go would make him/her happy, then let go.
*If you love someone, you would want him/her to be happy.
10-11-03 3.40pm Monday


10-11-03 5.44pm Monday
Now studying Physics. Can't concentrate! I guess it's cos I'm real real real weak in Physics. Most(not all) guys are better and some girls also(WW...still got who?!). And I also don't really like this subject. It's my worse Science subject after Biology. My best is Chemistry but certain topics quite badly done(eg. Periodic Table, Mole Concept). *Sigh*
When I go JC, if I do, I'll take Bio+Chem(if there is) and not Phy+Chem(unless there's no choice).
Actually, Caleb and I were quite close last time-but only as friends and god-siblings -so some people thought I liked him. Then, there was Fabian whom Shirleen thought I like him. I do but only as a friend. Then, there was SL whom my sis, WW and HW thought I liked. My GOD! He's just my friend, and, anyway, he has got 3 persons he likes(Huiqi, Milene, Yan Shan-or so they say).
Let me just say ONE LAST TIME! Guys and gals CAN be friends! I just don't understand why people think I like someone just because I am close to him or often talk to him! And now, it's JX or KJ as said by GA. GOD! OMG!
Does it mean I can't have close guy friends? Does it mean I can't talk to guys? Let me tell you, before I came to Xinmin, I had more guy than gal friends esp. during kindergaton when I was close to HuaZhi and JianHui.
10-11-03 6.25pm Monday
*Bu(4) yao(4) qing(1) yan(2) fang(4) qi(4), fou(3) ze(2) dui(4) bu(4) qi(3) zhi(4) ji(3)
*"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind." GA, you shouldn't take revenge on others if they do anything to anger you!
*"We cannot for ever hide the truth about ourselves from ourselves." GA, you should know the truth about the problem between you and...You should know it best. But I think that you are actually trying to think otherwise. You 'deleted' the truth from your memory and created you own version of the 'truth' about the problem.


11-11-03 10.06pm Tuesday
Happy birthday, Nyein2! Sorry, WW forgot to bring your present today!
Just had my Phy paper today. MCQ was a piece of cake, but I can't say so for P2. Haiz...
Today went to take WW's present from Kel. Shared a McDippers meal with Kel and SH. Went home.
Went online met HW. Talked to him. Before I could say bye, my sis pressed something and the screen went blank. I was so frustrated, I cried. (Yesterday also as my bro very disrespectful, and he had spoilt my Modern Love CD.) I don't know why but I really very depressed these days. There seems to be many new problems/troubles.
SMS-ed HW to apologise. Talked about ga's favor. He told me that it is best that I wash my hands off this matter and not get involved. I agree, but, well, I do hope I can do so.
(PRIVATE)
Now studying Bio.
Cell structure& organisation. Structure & function of animal cell's components. Cell membrane...
I'm mad! Just ignore me! Haha...just kidding.(Freddy will say:"How many kids do you want? Keep saying just KIDding.")
Suddenly I really miss my Pri sch days.(after I saw Caleb yesterday. Haiz) How carefree and fun it was back then for us. Now, we all face alot of stress and pressure. So sad so sad.
5566 rules. "We are the best!"(opps sorry. listening to UFM 100.3 then got their 'commercial' from Westside Story) But, really! I feel that 5566 is the BEST!!! Especially Tony :P opps...got too carried away. Love them! Love them! LOVE THEM!!!
11-11-03 10.25pm Tuesday
*Friendship is like standing on wet cement. The longer you stay, the harder it is to leave, and you can never go without leaving your footprints behind.


12-11-03 12.00am Wednesday
It's 12 midnight now. I'm channel surfing on the radio.
The 2 'stories' I wrote were partly adapted from 'stories' I heard on 99.9FM. (M'sia's 98.8FM)
I find that the stories are really very touching, very gan(3) ren(2) fei(4) fu(3), like I told WW. Very nice storied. Also, I learnt alot from these 'stories'.
We should treasure what we have before it'e too late. We should treasure the people around us before it's too late to do so. That's because we won't know when we will lose someone. And I hope GA can understand this. It's too late now. You didn't treasure Tranquil when you had the chance to. And now it's too late to make amends. So, I think that you should not hold on to your past. Instead, look forward to your future.(I'm sorry if anyone is hurt because of what I wrote. Please pardon me.) Be true to yourself. Only then can you be true to others.
Never hurt a female. She'll always remember it. A female's memoery is good at remembering all these little factors and all the emotional details. So, beware. Be careful, GA! Don't commit the same mistakes again. This is esp. so if you are talking to a Scorpio(Tranquil) or a Cancerian(me). That's because a Scorpio will remember everything you do and will hate you if you ever hurt her/him. You're a Scorpio too so you should know and agree. As for a Cancerian, they are fragile emotionally and gets hurt easily. Even a little action or word can hurt a Cancerian. Cancerians hide their feelings from others just like a Scorpio. Let me tell you. Even though I acted as if I didn't mind when you critised me, I actually minded. I was, and still am, very hurt. I hope that you will be very careful with your words in future or you may offend many people and make alot of enemies(in future, esp. when you're working, this will become a very big problem). Don't say I didn't warn you!
12-11-03 12.32am Wednesday


12-11-03 11.37am Wednesday
Hmmm...I think I got to save more money now as during the holidays, I would like to do alot of things-those I wrote in the other entry-and buy alot of things-CDs(5566-Westside story; WangLiHong, ZhouChuanXiong-Dubbing; HuYanBing;...) and VCDs(Westside story; MVP Lover; Meteor GardenII)
I think maybe if I go work then at least will have some more money. But then I don't know what I should work as and where. Phone operator? Fastfood outlets? In stores? I think after graduation night then I think about it. (opps...speaking of that, I don't know where my invitation card is. Got to go find it...)
MQ was just asking yesterday if we(WW,SH and I) would be putting on make-up. Actually, I think we should at least put on a little as the grad night is a formal event. So, with wearing formal clothes, make up is a must thing.
Haiz...I think I go study Bio now. See ya!
Cells, organs, tissues, xylem, roots, red blood cells,...
12-11-03 11.48am Wednesday
*People who spend today lamenting on yesterday, spend tomorrow lamenting on today.(My NGBF say one...)


13-11-03 12.13am Thursday
Happy birthday, Wang Wang!!!
I've known WW for like, 9 years 11 months and 13 days(there about...). Through these years, I've quarrelled with her for many times over many foolish and minute reasons. But, luckily, each time we overcame those quarrels and became closer. I've done alot of things to hurt many people, WW included. I remember that incident with YongHin. I'm really sorry,WW. When YH told me what he told you, he asked me to help him. Having been friends with him for a few years, so I decided to help. He said the others-Caleb, WeiLe, and a few more-knew about that matter, Sorry! And sorry, I told Lester what happened...practically everything I knew about the matter. Spent a long time on the phone with him. (But I've forgotten about the matter by now) Sorry!
Also, there was that incident with HuiQi in Sec2. For that, I think I should apologise to you, HuiQi, SH and HW. Sorry! We(Jul and I) really felt very left out at that time. That's why we went off on our own. Sorry!
And that incident in Sec3 about the MSN messenger about asking you who you like and pretending not to be me. Sorry! (Hee...don't know if you still remember or not?!)
And,and,and...haiz...in almost 10 years, alot of things have happened so I can't possibly name all...right?
13-11-03 12.25am Thursday
*"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift, that's why it's called the present." Don't keep thinking about what happened in the past. What has passed has already passed. Don't think about it anymore. Plan for the future, and treasure today. Forget pc and whatever that happened earlier this year. Don't be afraid to love. Do not let what had happened affect your future relationships. WW, remember that we-your friends-will always be there for you! Cheer up. Smile more. You've got a sweet smile so I hope to see you smile more often! :P


13-11-03 8.01pm Thursday
Gave WW the birthfay presents. She loved the blue cushion, and so did everyone present-Jo, MQ, Milene and Ling.
Bio MCQ was quite okay. But as for P2, it's another matter. I don't know "Why transpiration is important to the plant" and is amylase the lock or key and what about starch(from MCQ). And there are so many other questions to which I don't know the answer.
So tired. Slept at 2am, woke up at around 4.4oam. For MCQ, I did finish in 20-30 minutes then check twice and rested. Almost dozed off. For P2, rested for half an hour or so. *Yawn* Now studying Chem while listening to radio. Just now went online met HW. Offline then go rest while reading storybook. WW called. She told me that pc sent a cake and a bouquet of flowers to her house. Pc had not long ago asked SH and I for a favor but we refused. WW thought I gave him her address.(he did ask me on Monday but I didn't tell him) WW, I so so so sad and hurt. How can you think that I betrayed you?! Haiz...
Also, hw come you and SH keep changing the date of the KTV and Sakae Sushi? I now very tired of all there already. I don't want to think or care anymore!
*Just now WS called me to ask about the song dedication...(private)
13-11-03 8.20pm Thursday
(PRIVATE)
*Oh yeah...if you people went my blog these dew days you would find the background is blank. Now I've taken up HW's suggestion to right click on the wallpaper(from other websits) then press properties to obtain the URL. I hope this worls!


13-11-03 9.00pm Thursday
My head hurts now, very much, esp. when I move. OMG! I think I did not get enough sleep. Tomorrow, I'll sleep well and enough(at least 8 hours).
RAY-Ying(3)Si(1)
Love it. Now listening to it. Hope got Kel+SH+my dedication :P
Cos alot of people waiting for it...oh, DJ(Mary), please do read out ours! Thank you :)
13-11-03 9.02pm Thursday


*Relationships are like the sand you hold in you hand. If you ain't careful, you'll let the slip through your fingers. When you pick up another handful of sand, the feeling just would not be the same.
13-11-03 9.45pm Thursday
I just heard a song on 93.3FM. A song by WuQiLong or XiaoHuDui called YiLuShunFeng or ZhuFu or sth. Quite an old song. Very nice! I think I like it very much cos of an old show. It was about a very undisciplines class. A female teacher came. Instead of falling for their tricks, she revealed all of them; and became close to them. Then due to a problem, she had to leave them. Not long later, she came back. Thinking that they still played their old tricks, she opened the drawer to catch the snake but instead touched a pile of shit. That's the ending. I love it very much. But forgot the title of the show. If you do, can tell me?
Yes!Yes!Yes! They broadcasted our dedication. It's JJ LinJunJie's HuiDuShu! Fantastic!
13-11-03 10.50pm Thursday


14-11-03 4.10pm Friday
Whoa! Chem was quite easy actually. Phew!
SL gave a pig to WW. Said it was from him and Sj. Very suspicious!
Home sweet home. Internet. Saw HW. Talked to him. Halfway through, GA called me. Said he didn't send the cake or flowers, said he was eating it himsel, asked who sent them to WW, said he didn't give anything to WW when asked about the pig.
He asked me for a photo but actually I doubt I can find one.
Went beck to computer. HW offline already. Asked me to SMS him cos we were talking halfway then he went out. SMS him using ICQ. ICQ got problem, called him but line got cut off after awhile. SMS him via ICQ ask him to call me tonight or tomorrow. Haiz...if only GA didn't call. I was just about to tell HW something. Then now cannot. Then need to go through so much trouble.
(PRIVATE)
2 more 2 more papers left only! Hurray! And then we can go have FUN FUN FUN!
Then still got prom and chalet! :P happy happy happy!
14-11-03 4.28pm Friday
(PRIVATE)


14-11-03 9.51pm Friday
I don't like to be home! It's like everyone is giving me so much stress. Please! I do know what I'm doing. The more people nag at me, the more stressed I feel and the more I can't concentrate. I can't stand it anymore! I really feel like getting out of here. If only to get some freedom and peace.
I...I don't even know how I should put it. I've had enough. I just want to do things at my own pace. Only then can I do well and concentrate on my work.
14-11-03 9.59pm Friday
*"Hao(3) xin(1) mei(2) hao(3) bao(4)" HW say one. Only recently did I start to understand what this means. Sometimes, doing things for people may not be worth it as they may not appreciate what you are doing for them. Sometimes it's better to 'wash your hands off things and not get involved' as HW would agree, right? Just like the matter with the cake and flowers.
*Graduation night is like 12 days away. I can't believe that I'm about to leave my sec sch(xinmin)! It doesn't seem real. It's like, 4 years have passed just like that. Everything that happened the past few years seemed to have just occurred yesterday. Soon, we would go our separate, unique paths. Paths that may or may not cross. We may remember each other or maybe not. But, all the things that occurred the past few years and these few weeks would just be HISTORY.We'll look back at what we were like these few years, and think that we were childish, immature and unknowledgable. But, for now, we are as grown up as we can be. We do know what is right and what is wrong. Teenage years are the golden years of your life. We should treasure our teenage years. Spend it wisely and make sure that it is worthwhile.
*"Sorry". It is just a word. We can easily say it, but, to really mean it isn't easy.


15-11-03 5.57pm Saturday
Yes! 2 more to go! 2 more papers only! :) Happy!
I want to watch 'Wishing Stairs'! But SH say she don't want to. Then I can't possibly ask WW and Ling! (cos they won't want to watch horror movie one!) I very sad! Who can I ask to go? I really want to watch then must go ASAP cos only in cinemas for around 2 weeks(since 13-11-03 I think). SH say she don't like Korean movies/shows so no want watch. Haiz. 2 weeks. So by 29-11-03 must go watch. 18-11-03 last day of paper. 24-11-03, go shopping(last minute) for prom. 26-11-03, prom night. Then where can go watch the movie? Haiz haiz haiz...
SH asked if I want to work. I do. WW also. But where can we go? Fast food outlet? But I'm not good with people so I can't possibly work in the customer service section. Any ideas anyone? If yes, can tell me?
I now like addicted to 99.9FM(M'sia 98.8FM). Very nice. Then can improve my Cantonese and enjoy good stories from 10 to 11pm(I think). Love it! That's where I got the stories from 'Fruits Basket Stories Section'. :D
15-11-03 5.12pm Saturday


15-11-03 7.14pm Saturday
I want to go to the We're The Best! "Xi(1) jie(1) shao(4) nian(2) nao(4) shi(1) chen(2)" wo(4) shou(3) hui(4)! But cannot! Haiz...cos parents certainly won't allow. I guess I can only watch from the television.
*SIGH SIGH SIGH*
15-11-03 7.17pm Saturday


15-11-03 7.43pm Saturday
(PRIVATE)
15-11-03 7.54pm Saturday


15-11-03 11.21pm Saturday
I feel so guilty but I don't have the guts to confess all the things I've done. I've betrayed someone for so long. I'm sorry.
I can only tell her that I'm sorry.
I'm sitting on my bed now listening to 99.9FM. I had just read a Chinese book from Hwa Chong JC. I love the stories in there. Also, I find that the horoscope descriptions are all quite accurate.
(PERSONAL OPINIONS)
Now, I'm listening to 93.3FM. It's that song again! WuQiLong/XiaoHuDui's song. Love it! Love it! WW said the show is Tao(2)Xue(2)Wei(1)Long(2). Must go and find it after the 'o' levels!
AHH! Now listening to 100.3FM! They talking about tomorrow's 5566 Westside Story events! I want to go...but can't! Haiz...
Listening to Ayumi Hamasaki's A Ballads CD, to the song 'To Be'. That's the song they play when the DJ of 99.9FM reads the stories. Fantastic dong, don't you think? Very suitable song, cos it gives you a sad feeling(and the stories are sad) and touching feeling(some stories are pretty touching). So, very suitable!
(PRIVATE)
15-11-03 12.13am Sunday
*So what if you have just fallen out of love? Just remember that, (s)he has lost someone who loves him/her, while you have only lost someone who does not love you. If you think about it, you will realise that (s)he has more to lose.


16-11-03 1.48pm Sunday
2 more days, 2 more papers to go.
And 10 more days to grad(prom) night. Looking forward to it!
The last night that we would get together(as seniors) for a meal as a big group. After that, at most we would only get together with people from the same class or just with a few close friends.
It's a depressing thought isn't it? But then it can't be avoided.
And the next time we would meet up as a group is in March when we return for our 'o' levels results. Would we laugh? Would we cry? Would it be for happiness or disappointment? I do hope it would be for happiness, don't you?
I'm listening to a song from Fruits Basket now. Did I ever mention that I like Kyo (Kyou?!) from FB? He has been possessed by the cat spirit from the Chinese zodiac. And I LOVE cats! Maybe it's partly cos my Christian name, Mel, sounds like 'Meow'.
In Pri 5 and 6, some guys esp. Caleb liked to make fun of my name. That's why they call me 'Meow' instead. Caleb's nick is Carrot or Calebee (calibee). Raymond's is Doremon. Lester's is Molester. Chun Teng's is Chu(4) Teng(3) (rooftop). Chew Wei Le's is CWL(corrective work leader). Well, we were all so childish back then but we had lots of fun.
Now,

oNe NiTe, tHe StAr SaId 2 Me...
'iF hE MaKeS You cRy, WhY Dun U LeAvE HiM?'
So, i Lo0k BaCk aT tHe StaR aNd SaiD...
'sTaR WouLd u eveR LeaVe uR Sky?'

Men Are Hard To Please

The problems with GUYS:

If u TREAT him nicely, he says u are IN LOVE with him;
If u Don't, he says u are PROUD.
If u DRESS Nicely, he says u are trying to LURE him;
If u Don't, he says u are from KAMPUNG.
If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN;
If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS.
If u are SMARTER than him, he'll lose FACE;
If he's Smarter than u, he is GREAT.
If u don't Love him, he tries to POSSESS u;
If u Love him, he will try to LEAVE u.(very true huh?)
If u don't make love with him., he says u don't Love him;
If u do!! he says u are CHEAP.
If u tell him your PROBLEM, he says u are TROUBLESOME;
If u don't, he says that u don't TRUST him.
If u SCOLD him, u are like a NANNY to him;
If he SCOLDS u, it is because he CARES for u.
If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED;
If he BREAKS his, he is FORCED to do so.
If u SMOKE, u are BAD girl;
If he SMOKES, he is GENTLEMENT.
! If u do WELL in your exams, he says it's LUCK;
If he does WELL, it's BRAINS.
If u HURT him, u are CRUEL;
If he HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!! & sooo hard to please!!!!!

Which JUUNISHI member are you???

Omae wa dochira juunishi no MEMBAA desu ka?
[koyasunomiko.com]

1. Tests have shown that women rate 3% higher in general intelligence than men although their brain size is
smaller. Most women act dumb to make their mates look
good.
2. Women are walking radar detectors, that is why men have difficulty lying to women. Their brains have the ability to integrate and decipher verbal, visual and other
signals of body language.
3. Women want lots of sex with the man she loves. Men just want lots of sex.
4. When men flirt, they will lower their pitch of voice. Women will raise theirs.
5. Women talk and think aloud while men do them silently. As a result, men think women talk too much and are nags.
6. Women talk about their problems as a way of relieving
stress. She wants to be heard, not fixed by being offered advice and solutions.
7. Speech and words are not a specific brain skill for men.
They find it hard to express themselves. That's why they
often choose greeting cards with plenty of words inside.
That way, there's less space for them to write.
8. Women leave men, not because they are unhappy with what he can provide, but because they are emotionally unfulfilled.
9. Women uses an average of 20,000 communication words, sounds, and gestures a day. Men only use about 7,000.
10. So if a woman is talking to you a lot, she likes you.
But if she's not talking, you're in trouble.
11. Men are more thick-skined than women. Literally. Which explains why women have more wrinkles than men. Boys lose their sensitivity to touch by the time they reach puberty. So where does all that sensitivity go? It all goes to just one area.
12. If a woman is unhappy in her relationship, she can't
concentrate on her work. If a man is unhappy at work,
he can't focus on his relationship.
13. Men can only do one thing at a time. When they stop
their car to read a street directory, they have to turn
down the radio. Women's brains are configured for multi-
tasking performance. They can talk on the phone, watch
the TV and cook at the same time.
14. Most men get a brain hemorrhage after 20 minutes of
clothes shopping.
15. When it comes to sex, women need a reason; men need a place.
16. 15% to 20% of men have feminised brains. About 10% of women have masculinised brains. So there are more gays than lesbians in the world.

well....b4 i add in dat LONG promised entry 4 23-10-2003, i've got sth to write....
I think that person wouldn't be able to see this but I just write...
"It's too late, always, to regret what you've done. You can never erase your mistakes and all the hurt you've inflicted on others. Money can never solve anything. Don't think only for yourself. Spare some thought for others. Listen to other people's advice. Don't be too stubborn. You are never ALWAYS correct. So, it's always good to listen to others sometimes."
Well....i guess without sayin, some of u may noe whu i'm talking abt..(HINT: i've quarrelled wif him onli recently... 4e1 students shd noe)
oh yeah BTW..... NGBF de 'B' stands NOT for BOY!!!